excellent mommy-ness

so, this morning...charles had a meeting before church.

so one daddy-down, we made it to church happily (which is quite an accomplishment) with a little help from aunt jj who just showed up spontaneously to see if we needed any help. (yay!)

the older two decided they wanted to come in the sanctuary to be able to "worship God with music". i love that so, of course, i agreed. after herding the kiefer troop through a maze of people in the sanctuary to try to find enough seats for our family 0f 6...on the end so we can get in & out with the kids, and maneuvering in & out of several rows & shuffling people around, we got settled in.

as we got to enjoy the last song together, mylie then decided she really wanted to go to class (and asked repeatedly) while zeke paced back & forth.

i took zeke to his class while charles held down "the fort" or should i say "the row" (which we were occupying half of). then he took the older two once i got back. as the offering song began, it startled sophia out of her slumber & she decided it was long past due to eat.

as i pulled her out of her seat, i realized i never put socks on her. which maybe shouldn't be that big of deal. except that it is winter. oops.

and, that was just a 30 minute glimpse into my morning.

i want to be an excellent mommy. when we first had mylie & then charlie, i could muscle my way through my day. i could use the administrative/organizational skills i had to plan every second of every day and every option of every scenario to succeed.

adding a third stretched my abilities, but i managed. having our fourth, totally derailed "my-I-can-muscle-my-way-through-with-my-own-ability" train.

i love it. i needed derailment. until i got married, i lived an exhilarating life. i lived, by what many would call, faith. i trusted in God each day & saw His miracles through it all.

after i got married, i still loved God whole-heartedly, but for some reason, started thinking that I had to MANAGE my life. so i started working under an "efficiency" mindset. i had to be efficient at everything.

and, man, i can get a lot accomplished, but over efficiency often means under abundance. i did not abound in the joy & extreme love that i had had a few years before.

give me a few hours & i can run errands, grocery shop, do 3 loads of laundry, send emails, pack lunches for the next day...but i become like a human machine. and, i miss the joy of it all.

of course, there is not joy in everything. like as you change the third dirty diaper in a 10 minute span. or, as you clean your second spilled drink and you haven't even sat down to eat yet. or, as you are driving & all 4 children are having their own meltdowns about 4 different things & you can't help any of them because you have to keep the vehicle going to get them home...

but, since having my fourth, i have a new wind. i feel God at my side & it brings me a new breath. so, sophia doesn't have socks on her feet. or, my potty-training child poops in his pants at the library. you know what...it's ok.

being an excellent mommy does not mean i'm the most efficient or the most organized. it doesn't mean that my children look (or act!) perfect all the time. (although all of those things do help! heehee.)

being an excellent mommy means that i know how to trust God & bring joy & love to each of my children's daily lives. because in many ways, my attitude shapes their world. they function & learn better...they THRIVE...when mommy thrives.

how does mommy thrive? she thrives by having a happy soul. and you know what? God really makes my soul happy.